The Happy Leftie

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Monday, March 13, 2006

It's the (lack of) VALUES, Stupid: Republican slogans for the 21st century

Stephen Crockett

In the pursuit of truth in advertising, I am proposing a list of slogans that the Republican Party could use to accurately reflect their true political values and policies in the 21st Century. I hope all independent-minded voters will share this list with their friends and add their own suggestions.

• I Got Mine!

• Profits before People.

• GOP: The Greedy, Opportunist Party.

• War: We Love War!

• Do what we tell you, peasant!

• GOP: Greed, Oppression, Propaganda.

• Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid.

• To Hell with Democracy.

• Ignore the Constitution When Convenient.

• Corrupt the Church, Gain Votes.

• Who Needs Your Stinking Laws?

• We Got the Money!

• We Got Your Money.

• Everyone should sacrifice…. But us.

• Pollution is cool.

• Who needs science?

• We need more power!

• Voters, F*#*’ them!

• Truth is what we say it is!

• We are above the law, you are not!

• Cannot win, ignore the rules!

• Cannot win, cheat.

• Lie, lie and lie again.

• We lied, get over it!

• We own you... shut-up!

• Nothing is ever our fault.

• Blame Clinton!

• Ignore substance, call them names.

• Change the subject, quick, change the subject.

• In trouble, bomb somebody.

American voters would certainly be well served if Republicans would adopt some or all of these slogans. They collectively are reflective of common Republican attitudes prevalent in the politics of America during the beginning years of the 21st Century.